'At Holes' to Advocates: Mastering the Art of Talking with People, a conversation with Jason Raitz.

Show Notes: From 'At Holes' to Advocates – Mastering the Art of Talking with People

Guest: Jason Raitz, President of Speak With People

Chapters

1. Introduction & Guest Welcome

Chris Whitaker introduces the episode and welcomes communication expert Jason Raitz. Jason shares his background, mission, and the inspiration behind his passion for helping people communicate more effectively.

2. The Power of Words & Early Influences

Jason recounts formative experiences, including childhood moments and the impact of words—both positive and negative—on his life and career. He introduces the concept of "speaking with" versus "speaking at" people.

3. Building Bridges, Not Walls

Discussion on how communication styles can either build trust and connection or create barriers. Jason explains the difference between using communication to empower versus control.

4. The Voices Framework

Jason introduces the "Voices Framework," an acronym-based approach to understanding communication styles (Vision, Organizer, Insight, Clarity, Empathy) and how recognizing your style can improve interactions.

5. Communication Across Generations

Exploring the challenges and opportunities of communicating in multi-generational workplaces. Jason and Chris discuss adapting communication styles to bridge generational gaps and foster collaboration.

6. The Importance of Listening

Jason emphasizes the value of listening over talking, especially in sales and leadership. He shares practical strategies for asking better questions and being fully present in conversations.

7. Body Language, Tone, and Clarity

A breakdown of the elements of effective communication: words, tone, and body language. The conversation covers the importance of clarity, confidence, and non-verbal cues in building influence.

8. Practical Tips for Professionals

Jason offers actionable advice for professionals, including the TED acronym for open-ended questions, the importance of breathing and presence, and how to make introductions more memorable.

9. Overcoming Communication Barriers

The hosts discuss common communication pitfalls, such as rambling, lack of clarity, and failing to adapt to the audience. Jason shares tips for self-assessment and continuous improvement.

10. Final Thoughts & Resources

Jason and Chris wrap up with key takeaways: clarity is kindness, healthy communication is like oxygen, and everyone has the power to amplify their influence through intentional communication. Jason shares his contact info and resources for further learning.

Links & Resources:

• Jason Raitz: Speak With People
• The Wireless Way Podcast: thewirelessway.net
• Book recommendations: "StoryBrand" by Donald Miller, "The Next Conversation" by Jefferson Fisher

Contact:
For assessments, resources, or questions, email Jason at jason@speakwithpeople.com

If you enjoyed this episode, please share it with someone who could benefit, and check out the website for more resources and feedback opportunities!

Transcript

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 0:04

Hey, welcome back to another episode of The Wireless Way. I'm your host, Chris Whitaker, today I'm, excited to bring on a topic that's near and dear my, my heart. today I'm grateful to welcome a communication powerhouse from beautiful Tampa, Florida.

0:19

Jason Raitz. Jason is the president

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 0:23

of, speak With People, a dynamic keynote speaker, coach, trainer, and yes, a podcast host. It's always it is a little nerve wracking. Jason, have another podcast host. There's only room for one host, man. So I appreciate you being the guest today and, sit in the co-pilot seat for a while. a Little more about Jason before we bring him on. he's got a mission to help client-based professionals master communication to build trust, increase referrals. and drive consistent business growth. the word consistent, that's a challenge for some people. So I'm anxious to get your thoughts on that. he spent nearly 30 years speaking on stages, leading workshops and coaching leaders to speak with their clients and not at them. there's so much to unpack there, especially around leadership. today what we hope to, dive into and talk about is how to talk less and listen more. That's important to me personally. the power behind trust and effective communication. why influence isn't about being the loudest. Coming from a guy that's loud, I gotta hear more about that. but the listener who truly understands that's the goal. And practical strategies you can implement immediately, even today after listening to this episode, to build deeper connections and drive your business forward. get ready, grab your notebook and, let's unlock the kind of communication that transforms relationships into referrals and clients into champions. Welcome, Jason. thanks for being here. I'm glad we finally got this on the books and here we are.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 1:53

Oh, I'm honored to be here. Excited to, Talk with you, have this conversation, and thank you to your listeners for, joining in. This is fantastic.

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 2:01

so this has been kind of your lifelong, mission. I mean, for 30 years you've been in this, realm of, helping us communicate better.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 2:12

it goes back, geez, I'll be 50 in a couple of months here and it really goes back to one of my first rock concerts. I am pretty sure it was, Bob Seger, in Detroit at the Fox Theater. My parents took me. Pretty awesome parents who would take a

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 2:27

Yeah.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 2:28

to a Bob Seer concert. And, I was just in awe the entire time we're in the last row in the balcony watching everything happen. Adults, go crazy. I mean, I understand there is some substances at play and they're

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 2:41

Sure.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 2:41

a good time enjoying it, but at the very end he steps up to the microphone and starts to speak. And the entire place, it's like you could hear a pin drop. It was so silent. And I remember at 11 years old thinking, oh my goodness. that's power. That's incredible. That's influence. And so the very next day in my basement in Detroit, Michigan, I built a stage and then I would take my mom's chocolate chip cookies and I would beg my neighborhood friends to come over and listen to me speak. So I would do sales pitches or comedy routines or, they would just have to sit through my spiel and then they'd get the cookies. And so, ever since then. And I think, you know, maybe a childhood of some bullying where, you know, words, I just got the taste of how powerful our words could be. Then some adults who came in my life who spoke, words that basically changed the direction of my life. I got stuck in this mission that I would love to help people speak with

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 3:39

Awesome.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 3:39

When you speak at someone, you know, use fear, you use manipulation, you use control. You talk down to them. And, you immediately put up a wall between you and the person. when you speak with people, you create this bridge. And when you speak with you breathe life into them. When you speak at people, you suck the life out of them, speak with people, whether it's my clients, whether it's my family, whether it's people that I don't know, the random people who comment, Crazy things, on Facebook. wanna live a different life instead of those knee jerk reactions So yeah. Since then, I've just been on this mission. different seasons. I spent a lot of time speaking in public schools. So I did assemblies and I stood in front of middle school kids and high school kids, and I talked about the power of our words and how to choose the right words. And then it's transitioned to parents and teachers, and then it's transitioned to the corporate world. And primarily now I spend 90% of my time, in corporate training. So like this week I was at a few different headquarters here in Tampa. Training their folks. processing things, compliance accounting. they don't know how to communicate to each other. And when that happens, productivity comes to a screeching halt. finally somebody calls HR and there's, three people hashing it out. what if we knew how to talk to each other in a way that none of that happened? I lead workshops helping them that way. I lead workshops for sales teams. When it comes to speaking with their clients, how do you speak in a way that builds trust? So we've been able to develop this framework called the Voices Framework. all speak differently, and so when you understand how you were wired uniquely to speak. we took the word voice and we broke it into an acronym. some of us are vision, people, this could be the greatest thing you ever experienced. Some of us are organizer voices, you know, when we talk to each other, I have spreadsheets and type of things.

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 5:45

Yeah.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 5:46

Some of us are insight, we're kind of the sage. We bring the wisdom. It's deep, clarity, you know, we speak very simply. People understand it. And then empathy, some of us are like, our words are like a big hug. And so when you understand your voice, you can then, step into it and speak fully. So we've created assessments, frameworks, and we help companies, on either end. it's been absolutely amazing to be able to do this.

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 6:11

and you're right, it's such a. Part of being a human being, I mean, communication's at the core of everything, getting our needs, satisfied. You know, I want a glass of water. I mean, how you communicate. It's so important. I got one question. I'm gonna go back to the very first few statements you made. do you remember, what kind of cookies did you offer your friends? I mean, I'm a cookie guy,

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 6:33

Oh,

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 6:34

was it like anything or was there a particular type.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 6:37

No, she makes some pretty killer chocolate chips, so

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 6:39

Okay.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 6:41

things I'm trying to stay away from now.

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 6:43

Oh, that funny. Yeah. Me and you both. I stepped chocolate chip cookie, especially freshly made chocolate chip cookies. there's a time in my life where we would make'em like once a week just to have after dinner, whatever, Not anymore, man. I can't do that now.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 6:55

Can't, there's a crumble. dunno if you have crumble cookie where you are,

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 6:57

Yeah.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 6:58

and make these giant cookies. I gotta stay far away from that place.

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 7:01

Whew.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 7:01

if I drive by, I

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 7:03

Smell.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 7:04

this is ridiculous.

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 7:05

Yeah. And then there was always Oreo cookies, you know? are you the one that, would break'em apart and, eat the white Oreo filling? Or would you eat it as a whole cookie?

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 7:14

No, I broke it apart, did the filling first. And, you know, I took it a step further'cause I love actual cookies and ice cream, when you break apart the, I mean, it's just ugh. So good.

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 7:25

Yeah. later in life things change, it's this evolution. do you think the way, so I guess obviously you could say there's an evolution the way we communicate through. You mentioned earlier too, about, you know, being younger and how even your careers evolved. do you see that with professionals, I mean, people at different. You know, parts of their life, whether they're right outta college or new to the business versus, you know, guys like me. I feel like I'm on the back nine here, you know? And, do you see an evolution? Is that, is that necessary part of the journey?

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 7:56

the bummer part of the evolution sometimes for us older folks is get to a place where we've done it the same way for so long and then we refuse to change. I spend a lot of time in rooms and I'm that way with, different parts of my life. just'cause I'm passionate about communication other parts of my life, I've kinda let go by the wayside. think if we could catch, the younger version of ourselves, if you're mentoring leaders, if, if you are in a position where you're overseeing younger staff, teaching, my wife and I have five kids when we, you know, are older, there are adults now. The youngest is 11, 17 and then 22, 24 and 25, even when they were toddlers. they were talking and they weren't looking an adult in the eye, we would stop the conversation and say, okay, gonna start over. It's respectful. When we talk to people, we look them in the eye. We did this all the time. time and time again, I've gotten stopped by teachers and, pe you know, people that, they just know my kids who say I'm just shocked at how well they speak to adults. We try to, you know, bring that into'em. So if I could, motivate, encourage any of your listeners who have a voice into the younger generation, do not let them get away with shabby, communication habits. it really is the way effective communication impacts the bottom line. it's not just the bottom line of a p and l statement. It is the bottom line of your influence. the trust that people have for you. the bottom line of how well you'll do in life. And. I get the listener who's going, but you don't understand. I'm a flaming introvert. I don't like people. I understand. even in your introverted ways, and I can relate to some of that, you do have to learn some of these communication skills in order to be successful. our communication's a lot like breathing, right? We breathe all day long, but how often do we stop? that breath was magical. I'm gonna put that down in my gratitude journal. the only time we really pay attention to our breathing is when we get sick and our chest gets heavy. if any of your listeners are like me, I start to whine and complain to my wife and she's like, come on man, just man up.

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 10:03

Yeah.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 10:04

children, you can get through some congestion. For leaders. Don't wait till your communication is congested to where you know now all of a sudden you haven't paid attention, worked on it, and now your communication's toxic There's a reason why people are promoted. so many stats and data. show communicators are promoted quicker. and here's the thing. They could be a unhealthy, at hole type communicator, and they're still getting promoted because they're the loudest or the brass,

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 10:37

Right.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 10:37

they're the most talkative. But even in your introverted ways, if you learn some communication skills it will set you, above. those are some of the things that I get excited about. I was just in a room this last week with about a hundred employees from a credit union here in Tampa. I can see some of the eyes, when you're up in front of people, you can read the room. I could see some of the eyes like, oh, come on man. You're really talking about how we communicate. it kind of goes back to the old Allen Iversson, press conference years ago where he is like practice. You're talking about practice, like I'm talking about the game, but the reality is, practice is that important gotta get ready in order to do these things. So that's how important it's

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 11:20

Man, that's fantastic. I spent 10 years in the Army. It was my first career.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 11:24

wow.

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 11:25

it's funny'cause I had a first sergeant as I was talking about getting out and he goes whatever you do, you need to go into sales. I was an airborne Infantrymen, so the farthest thing from a sales guy, and I'm like, why do you say that? He goes,'cause every time I need something done, especially if no one else can get it done, when I send you, you always come back and say it's taken care of. So whatever you're doing, you must be influencing people or you have a way of talking to people so yeah, I was like, you know what, that again, the other lesson there is I had a leader and a mentor that gave me good advice

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 11:53

That's

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 11:53

and he explained it to me.'cause I'm like, why would you say that? Because I was almost offended. I'm like, don't you know, I'm like the ultimate warrior here. Of course I wasn't. but when, you know, 28 years old, I felt I was like GI Joe. but yeah. So yeah, I think leadership is so important and communication. It's kinda hard to be a good leader without communication.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 12:09

percent. And that's where,

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 12:10

yeah.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 12:11

we talk about on my podcast, the Speaking of People podcast,

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 12:13

no, please. I wanted you to tell us about it. I'll have a link in the, show notes.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 12:16

I love it. our communication really does fuel our leadership influence. Maxwell says, you're a leader if you have influence. I was doing a training once with a bunch of, tellers from a bank and a woman in the front row stops me and says, you keep calling us leaders. We're not leaders. We're just tellers. And I was like, ah.

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 12:37

That does sting.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 12:39

I was like, I get where you're coming from. But I looked at her and I said, do you have influence in your home? Well, yeah, yeah, yeah. Do you have influence in your

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 12:46

Yep.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 12:47

Do you have influence with your customers? You're a leader. And so how you steward that leadership is so important. communications currency, How you spend it, I think will increase or decrease your leadership influence. There's a reason why some of you work in a place where nobody wants to go by that office or cubicle because that person doesn't have any leadership influence. They may have wasted it. Their communication may be sharp, their tone may be off. They may misread the signals. Maybe they don't have emotional intelligence. you said something earlier, talked about the importance of communication. every conversation. for it to be a hundred percent successful, because sometimes we think communication is just, dumping information that's not communication. Sometimes we think communication is ramming it down someone's throat. That's not communication. Research shows us three things happen in every conversation. every conversation if you want it to be successful. Three things have to happen. One, have to know what you're gonna say. You know, there's, you've, you've got a thought brewing often I've said things that I definitely didn't think, I was like, oh no, why did that come outta my mouth? so that's gotta happen. And then what comes outta my mouth has to be attached to that. So it actually is what I was thinking. And then the recipient has to understand it. If you're a person who says things like, Does that make sense? is that clear? And you have to say that over and over, you're probably not getting that You know, those three things probably aren't, happening. So that's why it's so important. You talked about, the listening component. my fatal flaw of communication is I'm a talker, right?

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 14:31

Yeah,

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 14:32

My

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 14:32

guilty.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 14:33

a hundred miles an hour. I'm seven steps ahead in the conversation. I see where it's going, but it puts up a wall again. if I'm not listening to the person that I'm talking with, especially in sales, to them, I haven't asked any questions, I haven't asked what their problem is, the pain that they're experiencing, and I just dump out my solution, it's not gonna work. I may be able to force it. we see successful leaders who force their communication out of fear. These are, your typical micromanagers, but they may only see success for a short season. And then a staff member leaves, and then a staff member leaves, and then they get a new one and they force it on them, and then a staff member leaves. instead of shifting and going, okay, I gotta do the internal work. To make sure that I'm healthy, physically, emotionally, mentally, relationally, because if my inside is healthy, what comes outta my mouth is gonna be healthy. I've gotta do the work to assess am I an interrupter? am I a fidgeter? Am I looking at technology during an entire conversation? Am I making assumptions? Am I, you know, there's all of these barrier, blocks to the wall that we can create. So it's so much more cut and dry than just, you know, I just talk. No, there's a whole lot to it and especially if you're a leader and you wanna step into a role of leadership where you have influence over others, taking the time to improve your communication skills, it will do nothing but fuel your leadership. And that's what I love seeing when other leaders that happens for.

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 17:49

Yeah, so taking the time, to take inventory. you'd rattled off a handful of questions and I loved all of them, I had someone tell me once, take inventory of yourself daily. so if you're listening, you're wondering, are you a good communicator? definitely pay attention here. Take some notes, take inventory. you'd mentioned earlier about the breath, and I've been working on this lately. taking that cleansing breath. One, for guys like us who like to talk. it gives my brain oxygen, And two, it's that dramatic pause gives me a chance for my words, to formulate properly. it kind of, breaks that machine gun of words, we can deliver, at rapid rates. so you mentioned, you know, you, you've worked with bunch of professionals. you've clearly taken inventory and, and you're taking what you've learned over these 30 years and now you're teaching it. do you see any common trends when you're working with these professionals? is it as simple as, Hey, fix these three things and you'll be a great communicator? You know, is there any trends you've seen, and you know, how do you address'em when you notice these trends?

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 18:58

Oh, that's good. Boy, that's really good. It, you brought up such a good point about the breathing. sometimes in my workshops, I get an eye roll when I talk about the importance of breathing it's fascinating. I've been a public speaker forever. I've been in front of crowds of two to 5,000. for most leaders, it's kind of nerve wracking. I still get the butterflies,

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 19:21

Sure.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 19:22

one of the best things I coach leaders to do is breathing. I have breathing exercises that I do before every single time I present. I coach the same way when you're, you know, getting outta your car to go into a client meeting, do these breathing exercises you need to bring that oxygen in so it fuels your brain. It steadies you, it gets you complete. especially if you're about to have a difficult conversation,

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 19:43

Yeah.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 19:44

a lot, of us run from conflict. the quicker you stop running, the quicker your leadership's gonna grow. But if you, if you breathe before those. And maybe not in the presence of the per like, hold on a second. know, you don't it with them, but just some simple breathing, like four, you know, four seconds breaths in four seconds, holding it, seconds, breaths out. that exaggerated. It's amazing how it just brings us calming. I had a podcast guest on my podcast. he goes by the name Sing. He's an Indian gentleman, and he's like, my name is really hard to pronounce, so just call me sing. I was like, okay. is got great research on mindfulness and he said that you're meeting with clients, you're meeting with team members and you go back to back, When you sit down at a new meeting, your brain. For the first 15% of the meeting still 85% engaged with the meeting before. So when you sit down with a new meeting, especially for you're a boss and you're doing employee one-on-ones, and you don't give yourself time in between even five minutes to reboot, you're still gonna be stuck there. No one's gonna get your best self if you're doing sales calls and you've got no time in between calls. Just give yourself a few minutes, breathe deep for those 4, 4, 4, give yourself a second, now going back to your big question, any trends that I see? Yes, for sure. there is, a giant communication, I hate to say war, but a giant communication battle that's about to take place. And it's starting on a lot of fronts. Most workplaces, we have four generations. First time ever working together. Sometimes even five. gen Z is out there in full force. millennials are, there. Gen x, boomers, sometimes even the silent generation, God bless'em, are still in the workforce and they all communicate a different way. And underneath Gen Z, we have this new generation, generation alpha, that's coming up quick. They're gonna overtake everybody. There's so many of'em. boomers were the biggest for a long, long time. it's all coming to an end and there's this giant battle happening because Gen Z the research shows doesn't really like to talk. they'd rather dm, and they, if they do communicate, is so fast because they're the first digital generation. they've never had to wait for an answer. You and I, we went to the library. We got 10 books we pulled out. We don't have to do that anymore. You go to chat. GPT, who's 22 uses chat, GPT for everything.

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 22:34

Oh yeah.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 22:34

upload a video of his golf swing chat. GPT give me pointers, invest this money chat. GPT, what would you do? You know, we got boomers on the other hand who still love the respect. They love to sit down face to face. Millennials, they don't wanna do that. so if you are a leader in an organization listening and you lead people, I think one of the best things you could do is, try to get some type of training helping each generation communicate with each other. Because going back to the very beginning, what we talked about, some of us are set in our ways, if our eyes aren't open to go, is it unfair of me to expect Gen Z to communicate just like me, I meet them halfway, I don't have to change everything about it. I don't have to admit that they're right even when their communication habits wrong. But if I just go halfway instead of, forcing it on them, our organizations are gonna be so much healthier. we're actually trying to lean into each other's communication. that's just gonna be huge. if people can, walk through that, figure it out, all that kind of stuff. I think the second trend, hits us all, many of us forget that. great research. Years ago, A-U-C-L-A, sociologist researcher, Albert Meridian, he talked about in every conversation. The, as you look at the pie chart of what's happening, only 7% the communication that's happening is words. words are so powerful, right? I know 70 year olds who are still holding onto something their dad said to them when they were 10. all these years later those words still haunt you. So even though it's only 7%, there's still that much power. 38% of conversation is your tone. And if you've parented kids, you know how important tone is. 55% is your body language.

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 24:42

Yeah.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 24:42

And many of us, we don't recognize that we. You know, we're in a conversation, we cross our arms we're clicking our pen, we're looking at our phone every two seconds our eyes are looking away. We're touching our glasses, our earrings, all of these things add up It just builds that wall of communication. if you can recognize, some of those, healthy ways to communicate and, use them you're going to, keep building your influence. It really keeps coming back to influence, is just powerful.

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 25:14

I love how you broke down the different parts of communication and going by the taking inventory. Those are some other areas to take inventory. in my world, you do a lot of, lunch and learns. We do a lot of, education series where there's a half day and I get to work with a lot of different companies we'll protect the innocence here. But I mean, some of these companies will send presenters that are like sharp. Work the room, ask questions, engage, and then others, they stand at the podium, click the slide and read the slide. And I made a point now before the event, I'm like, look, we even do dry runs now before, like a week before, like, Hey, we'll do a Zoom call, teams call, we're gonna walk through'cause we need to give you pointers. these are expensive events. sometimes six figures and you were bringing in. 30, 40, 50, a hundred people. Some people are flying in, the value of events and, so yeah, that's important. And, the confidence you exude when you're talking. So if I'm telling like the stats you gave me, I don't even have to go look'em up. You, you, I, I believe you, you know, but if you're not confident in your words and, you know, have the right pauses in the right place, it just, it just kind of. One's paying attention, it's going one ear out the other. Those people start their phones, you lose. You lose the audience.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 26:28

even if you're an attender at one of those events, you know, we all go to BNI or Chamber or Rotary or meet and greets or lunch and learns, for years I spoke to middle school students, so wanna feel good about yourself, like, go stand in front of 800 middle school students.'cause they'll let you know right away, if they think you suck.

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 26:49

That's gotta be a tough crowd.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 26:52

really fascinating for me is, you know, I'm standing in front of these 13 year olds and now I stand in front of, 20 to 70 year olds and across the board, we all struggle with body image. We all struggle with self-image. there's a percentage of people who don't struggle with that at all. They walk

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 27:11

They seem perfect.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 27:12

for years I've been an extrovert. I think it's flip flopped the older I get. I think I'm less extrovert now and more introvert. I gotta push myself when I'm going to those events. Jason, this is gonna be good for you. Meet new people. Introduce yourself. even walking into that room, how do you walk in? Do you walk in with your shoulders? slunched, down, you know, is your eyes to the ground? do you walk in with your shoulders up Because that kind of presence, it speaks to something. It speaks to the fact that you go, you know what? I'm the only one of me on the planet, I'm gonna bring the expertise that I bring. And so when you get to that level as a human being, even if you're overweight, whatever your thing is that you continually discount yourself. Even if you get to the place where you're like, okay, I'm gonna bring the best version of myself. Right now I've been in a season where I've been overweight for a couple years. I got a really bad back L four's missing. I used to be a quote unquote athlete, ran every day, started a business, and then in the midst of trying to figure out, you go from the paycheck is just deposit every two weeks and now. Unless I book the next thing you know, the paycheck doesn't come, and then the back pain. I've used food, I've just gained some weight, and you get to this uncomfortable place and walk into these rooms and you're like, Ugh, I don't wanna be there. But you need to be as a leader, because it's good to be around other leaders, to build community, to build those kind of things. So whatever place you're in. Walk in with, your head up, your shoulders up, then be ready. So often you go to these meet and greets and people are like, well, what do you do for a living?

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 28:54

Yeah.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 28:55

And then somebody will say, I'm an office manager. a financial advisor.

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 29:01

A teller.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 29:02

use your communication as a way to be sticky and memorable. I tell, financial advisors a lot, instead of just saying I'm a financial advisor for Edward Jones. introduce yourself this way? What do you do for a living? you know how some people get to the end of their life and they just have this whole list of dreams that they never accomplished because they didn't have the money to do it. I help them put together a plan so they get to accomplish that list.

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 29:28

Wow.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 29:29

the heck?

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 29:30

Yeah.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 29:30

like I introduce, you know, when I introduce myself as speak with people, they're like, well, what do you do? Instead of saying, well, I'm a speaker, I say, you know, something along the same lines of there's a lot of leaders who struggle with being heard and they just want their voice to matter. I come alongside of them and help build their influence. So they speak in a way that other people listen.

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 29:54

Yeah.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 29:55

You know that, so for me it's like take advantage of those rooms. Even if I get to tell that to three people, I hand them my business card, I'm just an accountant. not just an accountant. You take away the stress. I'm a small business owner. I know what a pain and sorry asset is to deal with all the numbers and the IRS. And so instead of saying I'm an accountant, say, I take away all that stress so you can concentrate on your business.

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 30:19

It is funny as you were saying that, True story. I think it was last night. I'm like doing my nightly ritual of, Instagram reels and, this girl says, so what do you do? He goes, well, I'm actually internationally known global advisor for business development and customer retention to enhance profitability for corporations. It's just gave it on and on and on. And she's like. Why? And he goes, I'm a sales guy. You know, but it was a great, I mean, it was, it was literally, I felt like it was like two minute explanation of what he does, but it was, it was a, a sati of what you said. But I do agree with you. I go to a lot of these events too, and, I kind of cringe. it's not that big a deal. It's not that important. to your family it is. however, you're earning a living.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 31:01

Yep,

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 31:01

We all matter. Everyone has a story and matters.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 31:05

yep.

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 31:06

Now that was funny. spot on there. So pivot just a little bit. what does speaking with clients, not at them, look like in practice, especially when onboarding new relationships, something that I do a lot. Discovery calls with new clients, Speaking with clients, not at them. Break that down just a little bit more for us.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 31:30

Oh, I love that. I love that. Yeah. I love the discovery calls. all of that is so incredibly important. as you approach those, some tips I would use, and still I'm in the learning mode as well. one, we've just gotta stop asking boring questions.

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 31:49

Love it.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 31:50

if you have kids, you ask'em how their day was at school, what are they gonna say?

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 31:54

Fine. Good,

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 31:55

That's it. Okay. Game over. okay. why don't we ask different questions, to our kids, we can go through that later. But the same thing happens in our, discovery calls. How are you doing? Okay. How are you today? Okay. How's the business going? Okay. Those are fine questions, but questions really should be disruptive. Donald Miller talks, a lot about story in his book, StoryBrand. He is, one of the geniuses out there. He teaches companies, organizations, how to sell through story. There's seven parts to every story. the human brain longs for story. and so it does, right? How many billions of minutes of Netflix do we consume? You and I watch the reels at night.

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 32:35

Yeah.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 32:36

There is nothing better to me than just laying in bed at night. I know I shouldn't, like, I should be reading a book or resting my brain or whatever, but the short reels. I love it. Like I'm just like, this is so great, why? Because we love to be pulled into these little stories. so the same way with questions. What questions do is they unlock the genius of your potential client. So if you're able to ask a question in a way that disrupts their thinking and gets them to be creative, now their brain is burning calories and that's what you want to happen because now they're engaged with you. if I approach these discovery calls, these pre-calls even, with a set of planned disrupting creative type questions, I've done some research and it's easier than ever with Chad g Bt.

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 33:26

Oh yeah.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 33:27

here's everything this company does. Here's all my interactions. Give me the best three questions I should ask them that they never see coming. You know, for me, my bread and butter is in person or virtual training experiences. I'm either in person in a room and I take them through, whether it's a hour long presentation, a three hour workshop. you know, a series of, 30 to 45 minute virtual trainings. before I even start, I send them an assessment. You know, you talked earlier about okay, try to find those areas. Well, I have an assessment that helps you figure out, the areas where I've gotta improve. some of these meetings have this stuff already ready. Thinking through it. You know, I ask questions of my pre-calls, give me a breakdown in the generations in the room. a lot of times people are like, what does that matter? it matters because like we talked about earlier, all those generations speak differently. So I wanna know who's represented in the room, what's the breakdown between men and women, you know, what's the break? give me, you know, give me as much detail as the room. What percentage of the room would you say are your high performers? what percentage are, so you know some of those questions to be able to ask. So then when I do get to a client meeting, if you sit down face to face or you're over zoom, I'm not wasting any time. I have the questions ready to go because, listening is so incredibly important your client conversations I get stuck sometimes thinking. I gotta be doing the talking all the time.'cause I have to sell them. it's the exact opposite. You know? It's, it's really the 80 20 rule reversed, 20% of the time I'm showing up with my full presence. I'm with you. I'm not distracted by anything I, I'm writing, I'm asking great questions. And then 80% of the time, I'm just listening then I'm asking, different questions

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 35:25

Okay.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 35:25

did we talk about the TED acronym with questions

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 35:27

No, I don't think so.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 35:29

so anybody can ask great questions if you use the TED acronym. you wanna think in open-ended questions, how's your day? Okay, that's not open-ended. So somebody says something, you don't quite understand what they're talking about. So you start with the T. me more about that. Tell me more. well that's simple. Here's why you wanna do that. in your client relationships, there are seven different layers they have. Most of us have, to those, that relationship and the better question helps you unlock each layer. You know, you, you start at the top layer with the everyday stuff that, all of us are dealing with. it's the surface level stuff. you live outside of Atlanta. boy, I'd love to be in Atlanta right now'cause I'm a giant baseball fan and there's nothing else I'd rather do to go to Truist and, Paul Skees pitch for the National League and scribble pitch for the American League from my Detroit Tigers at Truist Park, one of the stadiums I haven't been at, you know, that surface level.

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 36:31

Yeah.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 36:31

I get down to the personal stuff with your client. I now know your spouse's name. I know how long you guys been married. I know. if you've got kids that you're struggling with, I know some of those favorites. Oh, you're a Starbucks guy. I know some of that personal stuff. Now I get down to the hopes and aspirations. like now I know you, and I know your love for podcasting and some of those aspirations around that. level four is some of those unspoken fears, stuff that I don't say out loud, But as I build a relationship with you I trust you enough. You've asked me the right questions, so now I open up, I share more with you. Then that moves to level five. Here's the current reality of where I'm at. so now it's okay, here I'm at, level six. You know, here's kind of the decision lens. I've gotta make some of these decisions in my life. I'm wrestling through them. then the seventh is kind of the legacy and identity, like long term. This is, want my kids to know and I, you know, all that kind of stuff. when you're able to ask questions that help you access those different layers, look out, cause now instead of just a one-time client, they're gonna stick with you. you activate the referral flywheel, especially if you're in, transactional stuff. So financial advisor, licensed banker, insurance agent, real estate person. those kind of, stuff. It's like, no, it doesn't need to be one and done. build that much trust I'm speaking with you, I'm asking those questions and I'm listening. Now you're gonna go, wait a minute, why are you not selling my Aunt Shelly's house? Why are you not, you know, have you talked, you gotta talk to my niece because you know, she needs, that's when the power happens. And so when we speak at clients, it's all transactional. We dump information. We don't listen to what they actually need. We interrupt them. We just talk about product. But when we speak with them. We come prepared. We have incredible questions ready to go. there's even research to show that when I hand write stuff down, face to face in front of them, that it sets these receptors off in the

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 38:54

Right.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 38:56

I can trust them because they lean, they're like this. Wow, this guy really cares about me. powerful stuff about speaking with.

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 39:05

Have you ever heard a guy named, bill StanNet with Sales Excellence?

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 39:09

No, but it sounds like I need to,

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 39:11

Yeah, I think he's actually, he, St. Petersburg. He is down your way. Actually, I can make an introduction. He's a good friend. he does corporate training, and, he has a module on diagnostic questioning. Man, I love it. And you know, as you were talking, you were like validating all of that.'cause, you know, he, that's what he talks about is diagno. It's challenging questions. You all know this book called The Challenge Yourself, which is kind of the same area, but you're right. I think To be a great communicator. a lot of it's listening and, being almost surgical and precise about where you're trying to take a topic or conversation. another guy I was curious to know if you've seen, Jefferson Fisher, I mean, yeah. He, he is like, just came outta nowhere. Right. I mean, but I, I enjoy his stuff. I mean, you know, he gives you two and three. He's like, here's three things to help you with a difficult conversation or dealing with the narcissist. all the little things that we deal with. And, I just finished this book, the next conversation, and you know, it, it was very helpful. A lot of good tips in there. it's like anything, right? every toolbox, you don't necessarily use every tool. In a project, but it's good to have them. It is good to have a complete toolbox. Nothing worse than had to make three trips to Home Depot.'cause you keep getting the wrong tool. Right. Yeah. so as we kind of, I feel like we've had a lot of great conversation already and we could probably go on for hours, but, I have a, you know, a DD myself as I think many of my listeners have told me they do too. Maybe. I don't know. But, uh, one last question I wanna hit you with. What's the one communication habit professionals usually overlook? something simple but powerful that consistently moves the needle on trust, referrals and loyalty. any thoughts on that?

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 40:56

Yeah. Whew. That's so good. I guess I would go right to clarity. Dr. Brene Brown says, clarity is kindness. if you communicate in a way that the eyes are still kind of glossed over, the people look at you like they don't quite get it, you've gotta do some real honest. Assessment down deep and go, okay, how do I make this as clear as possible? we wanna answer a question and we tell a story and we ramble clear is kind, jump right to it. I do a lot of coaching for public speakers and I teach the big idea method, which there should be one concept that's just repeated over and over throughout your talk 20 minutes after they left your talk, well, what was that about?

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 41:39

Yeah.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 41:39

Think about that, even in your day-to-day leadership, if your boss comes up to me and says, Hey, gimme an update on that project, and you're like, you're looking down, the ums are out of control, those type of things, You haven't really focused on being clear in order to focus on being clear, think through a few things. One, take some time to plan out what you're gonna say. So maybe you're in a team meeting and you know, you've got three minutes to stand up and present. put some time into planning out those three minutes and having a clear plan, if there's only one thing that I can say that I want them to remember. Say that first and foremost, instead of rambling, instead of telling a story, instead of all that, just be very clear with it. work hard, to focus on that clarity. I think if you know leaders, executive leaders, if they're clear with their communication, I mean it, amazing things are gonna happen for them.

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 42:36

You know, it makes me think about times where, in the corporate setting and there's a new boss coming in or someone's, oh yeah, I know so and so. one thing I love about him, you always know where you stand with them. cause again, they're clear. I mean, again, there's no guesswork. You don't have to wonder. Am I doing a good job? Does he like me? Do they not like me? but I like that. Clarity. Clarity. Remove the guess out of it. Right? Don't, don't leave your people. Don't leave people guessing.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 43:04

100%. I actually, in my book, I have a chapter, where we take, an acronym of clarity and just walk you through, whether it's a conversation, whether it's, putting together an update in front of people. But, you know, 100% I love how you put that. Taking out the guesswork, is just absolutely huge.

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 43:22

Yeah. That's great. I've definitely enjoyed our conversation. Check the show notes. there's more links and more information, about, the work that Jason. Doing here and, and, I think it's an important topic. we need to give this the attention it deserves. any last words? Is there anything we haven't covered you want to hit on or any of the thoughts you could share with us?

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 43:46

Healthy Communication is oxygen. when you make the decision to speak with people, show up with your best self, be clear. You make the decision to speak with your body to have a plan. You'll breathe life into them and don't ever get lost in the lie that tells you your words don't matter because your words absolutely do matter. you get to choose between speaking with people or at them. I highly encourage you to always speak with them because it will amplify your influence and give you a chance to serve people and there's just nothing better.

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 44:20

And it's mutual respect, right? I mean, it's like, you're right. when you're the leader or the subject matter expert, it's not about us getting the, it's about giving. It's about us giving the respect to the people that are listening.'cause their time's valuable too. I really like that concept of, being courteous and being considerate of other people's times being clear, makes me think about a lot of the meetings. I tend to sometimes, you know, going back to, you said earlier about sometimes you're still 85% in the last meeting. I wonder if like, sometimes if, if I don't manage my calendar properly, I'll get seven one hour calls back to back. I'm like, okay, how's this gonna end up? I'm gonna be a wreck by the end of the day. You get nothing done. I like a lot of the booking tools. Microsoft has one bookings. It's getting better, It's kind of glitchy sometimes, but if you set it up right, it can be good. But you can set it up going, Hey, make sure I got 15 minutes buffer between. My meetings, so don't book me at at, at the hour. In fact, I've seen a lot of meetings starting to be 45 minutes, that way if you need to go over a little there's some time, but if anything, you're done in 45 minutes. You got 15 minutes before five, the next one starts. So, man, we covered a lot, I really appreciate that. it's been a blast. Thank you.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 45:27

honor.

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 45:27

Yeah.

jason-raitz_1_07-15-2025_122034: 45:28

love, your conversations, your questions were amazing. for your listeners, I try to make myself as available as possible. My email is jason@speakwithpeople.com, so if you want any of these assessments that I talked about, if you want more information, if you have a question, I love to help answer whatever I can.

chris_1_07-15-2025_122034: 45:45

Man, I love it. It rise of tide rises all boats. Iron sharpens iron They're cliches because there's truth in them, you know? I mean, that's why they live. The test of time, Well, there you go folks. Another episode of The Wireless Way. Please check the show notes, and as always, if you were listening to this episode. And someone popped in your mind, you thought, oh man, so and so could really benefit from this. Share this episode with them. I really appreciate that. And of course, check out the website, the wireless way.net. There's a contact us button if you have any suggestions, feedback, love to hear from you. That's the wireless way.net. And I'll see you next time on the wireless way.